Weddings - Soul-Sucking Leeches or Fantasy-Realizations
First, a quick note: apparently I'm a totally abnormal fiance. The more shows I watch and books I read, the more I understand that men either don't care about wedding planning or have horribly bad ideas that their obsessive bride-to-be shoots down while belittling every aspect of their future husband. I, however, don't find this wedding planning stuff to be avoidance-inducing-poison. Plus, Megan and I have such similar tastes that our ideas almost always coincide. This, apparently, is not common. Case in point...a recent conversation at work:
Me: So we're going to a Crate & Barrel registry thing tomorrow.
Co-Worker 1: (Said sarcastically) Ugh...I'm sure that will be fun.
Co-Worker 2: Seriously.
Me: Um, well, I'm looking forward to it. It's all kinda fun.
Co-Worker 1: (Said to Co-Worker 2) Woah, who is this guy, it can't be Grant we're talking to.
Anyway, I've been warned time and again that planning a wedding will stress you out to the point where you simply want to crawl into a hole and hide 'til it's all over. And yeah, I can see that point of view. This past weekend I drove to and from Redlands to visit a venue (before having to work that night), to and from Pomona for a wedding expo, to and from Riverside to meet a photographer, and to and from Irvine to meet a videographer. An entire tank of gas and a lot of missed sleep later, I'm done. I never want to do that much wedding work in a 3-day period ever again.
The word "budget" is now my biggest enemy, and trying to find cost-effective solutions to one of the most expensive days I will ever participate in is maddening. There are literally hundreds of minute details that have to work perfectly together to make this upcoming day possible. The word "thousand" (as in $1,000) gets thrown around like it's no big deal. Suddenly eloping sounds like a wonderful option.
Megan and I don't get a lot of time together in the first place due to completely conflicting work schedules and a 45-minute drive between us. Now, instead of just getting to hang out every once in a while, we are spending almost all our limited and precious time together going over wedding details.
But...on the other hand, thinking of this day that is now 1 year and 3 months away, is completely joy-inducing. Putting together small pieces that will eventually equal a complete day is like doing a puzzle that I can't wait to see completed. Considering my future with Megan, the thing this day will officialize, makes me wish that it was happening tomorrow. Going through all the trials and difficulties of planning seems like a minuscule task when compared to the end result.
So in the end, weddings are both a worthy adversary, and a welcome friend. So far I wouldn't change anything. I know that no matter how hard things get, or how difficult things feel, in the end it will all be worth it. I simply can't wait to be Megan's husband.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
Just something I want to say...
I have recently had some really amazing conversations with people that delved into the area of religion. I love talking about religious ideas. Let me reiterate. I absolutely love getting into deep conversations about "religious" issues. My love, however, is not the stereotypical Bible-thumping, ideal-force-feeding that most people are used to.
And in all truthfulness I feel horrible that I have to make the distinction between amazing conversation/debate and personal-ideal-bashing.
Many, many Christians today are all about luring people into conversation about the sin-nature of humanity only to end up debasing, devaluing, and undermining another's opinions. I find such actions despicable (especially when one's intentions are to get another to such a point where such actions are an option).
There is a difference in attempting to get one into conversation so that both parties can be edified and attempting to get one into conversation with the sole desire to prove the other party wrong at any cost.
So, my point (since I meant for this to be a short and to the point post): I implore you to ignore all the ignorant and stupidly-stubborn Christians out there and to find the educated religious people out there. I will gladly engage in philosophic, religious, scientific conversation with anybody. Yeah, I have religious beliefs; but that does not mean, by any means, that I am willing to ignore reason/logic/truth.
The Christians that most people are aware of are those portrayed by news stations. The ones who show up to the funeral of a gay soldier and scream, "Your son is going to hell!" through a megaphone. That makes me indescribably sad since the true meaning behind what I believe is not (in any way, shape, or form) understood.
For example: If a car company makes a car that I think is unsafe, I have two ways of going about telling people my beliefs. 1) I can stand on a street corner and scream and shout. I can confront people and belittle them for their belief that said car is safe. I can be bold and upfront and (seemingly) crazy about this car's lack of safety. Or 2) I can study, do my research, and come up with indisputable facts. I can then talk to people and show them my findings. If those people have counter-examples, I can take them into account and see if they hold any truth and then inform said people about how they have been fed misinformation.
This is just like the religious debates that happen today. Whether the topic is homosexuality, abortion, gun-control, pornography, health-care, etc, there should be a debate (read: discussion) about the issue. Life is not black and white, and neither is the religious view of these issues (though many would like you to think that it is).
In other words, I apologize on behalf of all the crazies out there. SO many people give religious belief a bad name, and I want to correct that. I realize that this is a losing battle. And I realize that no matter how many people out there are reasonable in their debate methods, there will always be a thousand more willing to ignore reason and stupidly argue for unprovable truths. But...I am still willing to fight to inform people that not every religious person is so ignorant. My end goal? If all the incredibly smart, incredibly logical people out there are willing to have meaningful discussions with the (equally incredibly smart) religious people out there, the end result will be more knowledge and understanding than we had in the first place.
And if knowledge is the end goal, I am all for it.
I have recently had some really amazing conversations with people that delved into the area of religion. I love talking about religious ideas. Let me reiterate. I absolutely love getting into deep conversations about "religious" issues. My love, however, is not the stereotypical Bible-thumping, ideal-force-feeding that most people are used to.
And in all truthfulness I feel horrible that I have to make the distinction between amazing conversation/debate and personal-ideal-bashing.
Many, many Christians today are all about luring people into conversation about the sin-nature of humanity only to end up debasing, devaluing, and undermining another's opinions. I find such actions despicable (especially when one's intentions are to get another to such a point where such actions are an option).
There is a difference in attempting to get one into conversation so that both parties can be edified and attempting to get one into conversation with the sole desire to prove the other party wrong at any cost.
So, my point (since I meant for this to be a short and to the point post): I implore you to ignore all the ignorant and stupidly-stubborn Christians out there and to find the educated religious people out there. I will gladly engage in philosophic, religious, scientific conversation with anybody. Yeah, I have religious beliefs; but that does not mean, by any means, that I am willing to ignore reason/logic/truth.
The Christians that most people are aware of are those portrayed by news stations. The ones who show up to the funeral of a gay soldier and scream, "Your son is going to hell!" through a megaphone. That makes me indescribably sad since the true meaning behind what I believe is not (in any way, shape, or form) understood.
For example: If a car company makes a car that I think is unsafe, I have two ways of going about telling people my beliefs. 1) I can stand on a street corner and scream and shout. I can confront people and belittle them for their belief that said car is safe. I can be bold and upfront and (seemingly) crazy about this car's lack of safety. Or 2) I can study, do my research, and come up with indisputable facts. I can then talk to people and show them my findings. If those people have counter-examples, I can take them into account and see if they hold any truth and then inform said people about how they have been fed misinformation.
This is just like the religious debates that happen today. Whether the topic is homosexuality, abortion, gun-control, pornography, health-care, etc, there should be a debate (read: discussion) about the issue. Life is not black and white, and neither is the religious view of these issues (though many would like you to think that it is).
In other words, I apologize on behalf of all the crazies out there. SO many people give religious belief a bad name, and I want to correct that. I realize that this is a losing battle. And I realize that no matter how many people out there are reasonable in their debate methods, there will always be a thousand more willing to ignore reason and stupidly argue for unprovable truths. But...I am still willing to fight to inform people that not every religious person is so ignorant. My end goal? If all the incredibly smart, incredibly logical people out there are willing to have meaningful discussions with the (equally incredibly smart) religious people out there, the end result will be more knowledge and understanding than we had in the first place.
And if knowledge is the end goal, I am all for it.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Recession-Proof Industries and Why We Love Them
Something that has been on my mind lately (and surely has been on many minds) is the recession we are currently facing. While contemplating how I am going to pay for this month's bills (as well as other unforeseen costs like the 4 brand new tires I bought today (as well as saving for enormous costs like, well, that wedding I'm going to be in not too far from now)) I began wondering about the so-called "recession-proof" industries. My basic question is, "why, despite a recession reminiscent of the Great Depression (though economic analysts are pointing out that we are in much better shape than the impossible times of 1929) are some industries booming?"
So I thought I'd look at some of these recession-proof industries to figure out why the American public is willing to fuel some businesses and not others. Here's a brief look at some of these industries:
Pet and Supply Stores
These businesses boom despite economic hardship, and the reason seems simple: Those who already have pets are going to continue to take care of them; and those who don't are still willing to buy a loving friend who will make them feel better despite hard times in all other areas.
Hollywood
I would have named this one "movies," but that is a bit too narrow. "Hollywood" incorporates theater-released films, DVDs, etc. Why does entertainment continue to flourish? People need an escape. A family might be struggling to pay the bills and feed hungry mouths; but the best way to forget that things are hard is to head to the theater and delve into a fantasy world of fun and imagination. The price might be high (I remember paying $5.00 for a film); but it is apparently worth it to get away from harsh reality.
Video Games
So person X is eating top-ramen and only driving to necessary locations due to gas prices, yet X is willing to buy a $60 video game. Why? The "Hollywood" example fits the bill. Escaping into an alternate reality is the best way to ignore how bad things are. Plus, $60 doesn't seem like so much when it affords one so many hours of entertainment. $10 buys one a movie ticket which gives 1-3 hours of escape; but a good video game offers 10-100 hours of escape. Economically, this is a great way to still get away from the current economic situation and still save some dough.
Porn
It is well documented how well the pornographic industries do no matter how the world's economics are panning out. This one is a no brainer...even in times where money is lacking, people are willing to pay just about anything to get off. Making porn doesn't cost much at all, and buying it allows a sexual release. Yeah, the porn industry is asking for a bail out; but trust me, they don't need it.
Drugs
Ok, so this isn't really an "industry" in the normal sense of the word, but there are many, many people who make their income from it. Just like movies, video games, and porn...drugs are an escape. And apparently people are willing to pay for something to get away from the truth.
I could go on and on; but the trend is already clear. People are willing to pay for just about anything to forget their troubles. It's almost as if a recession is good for these industries.
Oh, wait...there's one more group that a recession is good for. But this one is tricky. It's good for the rich. If I have a lot of money and a recession hits, I have a great opportunity...buying property, businesses, etc, is easy if you have the money because people need to offload extra houses, failing business, and the like. If you have the money to buy these commodities off of the less fortunate, and have the time to wait til the economy rises again, the money that can be made from re-selling these commodities at a high price is absurd.
I'm not sure if I even have a point here. I guess my point is that understanding human psychology is key to surviving such a crisis. That, or being rich in the first place. It's funny...despite understanding these trends, I am still seeing movies, buying video games, and never even considering getting rid of my dog...even though each of said actions hurts my chances of making it through this time in a decent state.
And even though humans are predictable, and capital can be made from them (through possibly conniving methods), I don't find this to be a bad thing. Anything that gives hope (even "false hope") and allows people to fight through hardship has some merit to it.
In other words...I'm glad that I have movies and games and pets to help me ignore thoughts of crawling into bed and sleeping through deep states of depression. Even though people make money off of our misery, there actually is a silver-lining to the cloud. We, as humans, have figured out a way to ignore crippling defeat. If resilience is brought about only by means of entertainment and ignoring of the hard truth, then I am all for the recession-proof industries.
Something that has been on my mind lately (and surely has been on many minds) is the recession we are currently facing. While contemplating how I am going to pay for this month's bills (as well as other unforeseen costs like the 4 brand new tires I bought today (as well as saving for enormous costs like, well, that wedding I'm going to be in not too far from now)) I began wondering about the so-called "recession-proof" industries. My basic question is, "why, despite a recession reminiscent of the Great Depression (though economic analysts are pointing out that we are in much better shape than the impossible times of 1929) are some industries booming?"
So I thought I'd look at some of these recession-proof industries to figure out why the American public is willing to fuel some businesses and not others. Here's a brief look at some of these industries:
Pet and Supply Stores
These businesses boom despite economic hardship, and the reason seems simple: Those who already have pets are going to continue to take care of them; and those who don't are still willing to buy a loving friend who will make them feel better despite hard times in all other areas.
Hollywood
I would have named this one "movies," but that is a bit too narrow. "Hollywood" incorporates theater-released films, DVDs, etc. Why does entertainment continue to flourish? People need an escape. A family might be struggling to pay the bills and feed hungry mouths; but the best way to forget that things are hard is to head to the theater and delve into a fantasy world of fun and imagination. The price might be high (I remember paying $5.00 for a film); but it is apparently worth it to get away from harsh reality.
Video Games
So person X is eating top-ramen and only driving to necessary locations due to gas prices, yet X is willing to buy a $60 video game. Why? The "Hollywood" example fits the bill. Escaping into an alternate reality is the best way to ignore how bad things are. Plus, $60 doesn't seem like so much when it affords one so many hours of entertainment. $10 buys one a movie ticket which gives 1-3 hours of escape; but a good video game offers 10-100 hours of escape. Economically, this is a great way to still get away from the current economic situation and still save some dough.
Porn
It is well documented how well the pornographic industries do no matter how the world's economics are panning out. This one is a no brainer...even in times where money is lacking, people are willing to pay just about anything to get off. Making porn doesn't cost much at all, and buying it allows a sexual release. Yeah, the porn industry is asking for a bail out; but trust me, they don't need it.
Drugs
Ok, so this isn't really an "industry" in the normal sense of the word, but there are many, many people who make their income from it. Just like movies, video games, and porn...drugs are an escape. And apparently people are willing to pay for something to get away from the truth.
I could go on and on; but the trend is already clear. People are willing to pay for just about anything to forget their troubles. It's almost as if a recession is good for these industries.
Oh, wait...there's one more group that a recession is good for. But this one is tricky. It's good for the rich. If I have a lot of money and a recession hits, I have a great opportunity...buying property, businesses, etc, is easy if you have the money because people need to offload extra houses, failing business, and the like. If you have the money to buy these commodities off of the less fortunate, and have the time to wait til the economy rises again, the money that can be made from re-selling these commodities at a high price is absurd.
I'm not sure if I even have a point here. I guess my point is that understanding human psychology is key to surviving such a crisis. That, or being rich in the first place. It's funny...despite understanding these trends, I am still seeing movies, buying video games, and never even considering getting rid of my dog...even though each of said actions hurts my chances of making it through this time in a decent state.
And even though humans are predictable, and capital can be made from them (through possibly conniving methods), I don't find this to be a bad thing. Anything that gives hope (even "false hope") and allows people to fight through hardship has some merit to it.
In other words...I'm glad that I have movies and games and pets to help me ignore thoughts of crawling into bed and sleeping through deep states of depression. Even though people make money off of our misery, there actually is a silver-lining to the cloud. We, as humans, have figured out a way to ignore crippling defeat. If resilience is brought about only by means of entertainment and ignoring of the hard truth, then I am all for the recession-proof industries.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
A Reason To Fight
There are many reasons to have faith. There are many reasons to believe in the improvable. There are many reasons to devote oneself to religion. And many of those reasons are ridiculous.
Blind faith is a way to reject the obviously true (e.g. "I don't care that science has shown the earth to be billions of years old, I have faith that evolution is false and the earth is less than 5,000 years old). Following a holy text to the ends of the earth, even when taken horribly out of context, is a way to justify atrocious actions. And all religious experiences are an easy catch-all (due to their improvability).
But even with all the ignorance and stupidity, there is reason to follow what modern man has termed religion.
There's an amazing song by the band Air called "Biological" which gives credence to one of the many reasons I am a Christian. The basic premise of the song is a man declaring his "love" for another. Following a purely physicalist worldview, the best (read: only) reason he can come up with for his attraction is this:
Biological
I don't know why I feel that way with you
Biological
I need your DNA
You can find the rest of the lyrics here (and I definitely recommend checking the band out if you don't already know of them).
So, a man loves a woman. He can't live without her. His very breath depends on her existence. Why? His DNA necessitates his attraction to her. Take Darwinism to the extreme and you have the meaning of this song. A male has a biological need to propagate his line. A female has a biological desire to have offspring. And in some cases, the DNA of the two fits in such a way that the firing of synapses and physiological responses form a stronger bond than is common. This is what we call "love."
But wait, (you might say) I love my girlfriend...and it's way more than electricity running through a warm body! Well, there is where I would agree with you. And there is where the common physicalist has little else to say.
If you deny the supernatural/metaphysical/spiritual, then you deny the existence of love. Let's take this a step further. If you deny the existence of a creative God, then love is merely a physiological response and is, in all respects, nothing special. For the purely scientific and purely scientific-method-provable types out there, love is a means to and end (i.e. propagation).
Let's take it even further. If you believe in spirituality (but not religion), love is some vague force that binds individuals together for some unknown reason. No, you "spiritual but not religious" people out there cannot say that it is 1) to make us happy, or 2) to give us a reason to exist, or even 3) simply because. Why? Well, 1) has firm roots in eudaimonism which feeds directly into Christianity (or Judaism or Islamic culture if you are being picky); 2) is incomprehensible because a reason for existence requires forethought and planning (something that the "let's tap into the spiritual but never admit to God" crew cannot accept). If there is a reason we are on this celestial orb, there had to be someone (or something) behind said reason; and 3) (the "brute fact" approach) is as lazy and undefendible [made-up word of the day] as the right-wing Christians who say, "It just is! Ok?!?".
I happen to follow the Christian worldview. This worldview is not the modern day understanding of Christianity. If that confuses you, ask me, I'll explain it in depth. I also happen to want to believe that love is more than some chemicals in my brain. Following Occam's Razor, the easiest solution to my desire to find love to be something substantial, Christianity fits the bill. If a omnibenevolent being created this earth (and us with it), it is not far fetched to believe that this being wants us humans to feel what it feels. Since this being is (or so argues Christianity) omnibenevolent, omnipotent, omniscient, and all other ultimate-good traits, it can choose to create if it so wishes (by the way, I'm using "it" so as not to offend the feminists, race advocates, etc). If this being creates, the creatures it creates will not be as perfect as it is (argument being [simplified]: a god could not create a perfectly analoguous god). Being all good, all loving (etc), this being would obviously want to create said creatures with the ability to communicate, love, desire, (fill in this blank with any good thing...the list is almost endless) just like it does.
Now here comes the specifically Christian part. Since God is triune (you know, the trinity), there is communion and love be†ween the triune godhead. If God (sorry, I switched from "being" to "God," trust me, it will all make sense...hopefully) is perfect in every way, the love and communion between the three parts of the trinity is perfect. Since we (God's creation) are created as inferior beings (out of logical necessity), the best we can hope for is to strive to gain as close an analog to God's traits as possible. If this is the case, our feelings of love, gratitude, hopefulness, etc (once more, the list goes on and on) are directly related to a perfect example that we can only hope to live up to.
This fits in directly with Aristotle's idea of perfection. He argued that the only reason we humans have any conception of perfection in the first place is due to God's perfection. For example: if humans never had eyes (as in, ocular senses never exited), we would never wonder what it would be like to see. In the same sense, the only reason we strive for perfection is because we have an innate sense of perfection (due to the God that created us). In other words, if there is no such thing as a perfect being, how could we even conceive of perfection?
Wow, um, that was a lot more than I intended to say. So what's the bottom line? When I tell Megan that I love her, I want to believe that my words are not simply references to biological (and thusly meaningless (at least in a grand perspective)) imperatives. I want my words to convey what I actually mean: that I reflect the perfection of the God that created me, that God's love, when I say, "I love you." If I give up my faith, my beliefs, my love loses all meaning.
And that is one of the myriad reasons I follow a religion.
There are many reasons to have faith. There are many reasons to believe in the improvable. There are many reasons to devote oneself to religion. And many of those reasons are ridiculous.
Blind faith is a way to reject the obviously true (e.g. "I don't care that science has shown the earth to be billions of years old, I have faith that evolution is false and the earth is less than 5,000 years old). Following a holy text to the ends of the earth, even when taken horribly out of context, is a way to justify atrocious actions. And all religious experiences are an easy catch-all (due to their improvability).
But even with all the ignorance and stupidity, there is reason to follow what modern man has termed religion.
There's an amazing song by the band Air called "Biological" which gives credence to one of the many reasons I am a Christian. The basic premise of the song is a man declaring his "love" for another. Following a purely physicalist worldview, the best (read: only) reason he can come up with for his attraction is this:
Biological
I don't know why I feel that way with you
Biological
I need your DNA
You can find the rest of the lyrics here (and I definitely recommend checking the band out if you don't already know of them).
So, a man loves a woman. He can't live without her. His very breath depends on her existence. Why? His DNA necessitates his attraction to her. Take Darwinism to the extreme and you have the meaning of this song. A male has a biological need to propagate his line. A female has a biological desire to have offspring. And in some cases, the DNA of the two fits in such a way that the firing of synapses and physiological responses form a stronger bond than is common. This is what we call "love."
But wait, (you might say) I love my girlfriend...and it's way more than electricity running through a warm body! Well, there is where I would agree with you. And there is where the common physicalist has little else to say.
If you deny the supernatural/metaphysical/spiritual, then you deny the existence of love. Let's take this a step further. If you deny the existence of a creative God, then love is merely a physiological response and is, in all respects, nothing special. For the purely scientific and purely scientific-method-provable types out there, love is a means to and end (i.e. propagation).
Let's take it even further. If you believe in spirituality (but not religion), love is some vague force that binds individuals together for some unknown reason. No, you "spiritual but not religious" people out there cannot say that it is 1) to make us happy, or 2) to give us a reason to exist, or even 3) simply because. Why? Well, 1) has firm roots in eudaimonism which feeds directly into Christianity (or Judaism or Islamic culture if you are being picky); 2) is incomprehensible because a reason for existence requires forethought and planning (something that the "let's tap into the spiritual but never admit to God" crew cannot accept). If there is a reason we are on this celestial orb, there had to be someone (or something) behind said reason; and 3) (the "brute fact" approach) is as lazy and undefendible [made-up word of the day] as the right-wing Christians who say, "It just is! Ok?!?".
I happen to follow the Christian worldview. This worldview is not the modern day understanding of Christianity. If that confuses you, ask me, I'll explain it in depth. I also happen to want to believe that love is more than some chemicals in my brain. Following Occam's Razor, the easiest solution to my desire to find love to be something substantial, Christianity fits the bill. If a omnibenevolent being created this earth (and us with it), it is not far fetched to believe that this being wants us humans to feel what it feels. Since this being is (or so argues Christianity) omnibenevolent, omnipotent, omniscient, and all other ultimate-good traits, it can choose to create if it so wishes (by the way, I'm using "it" so as not to offend the feminists, race advocates, etc). If this being creates, the creatures it creates will not be as perfect as it is (argument being [simplified]: a god could not create a perfectly analoguous god). Being all good, all loving (etc), this being would obviously want to create said creatures with the ability to communicate, love, desire, (fill in this blank with any good thing...the list is almost endless) just like it does.
Now here comes the specifically Christian part. Since God is triune (you know, the trinity), there is communion and love be†ween the triune godhead. If God (sorry, I switched from "being" to "God," trust me, it will all make sense...hopefully) is perfect in every way, the love and communion between the three parts of the trinity is perfect. Since we (God's creation) are created as inferior beings (out of logical necessity), the best we can hope for is to strive to gain as close an analog to God's traits as possible. If this is the case, our feelings of love, gratitude, hopefulness, etc (once more, the list goes on and on) are directly related to a perfect example that we can only hope to live up to.
This fits in directly with Aristotle's idea of perfection. He argued that the only reason we humans have any conception of perfection in the first place is due to God's perfection. For example: if humans never had eyes (as in, ocular senses never exited), we would never wonder what it would be like to see. In the same sense, the only reason we strive for perfection is because we have an innate sense of perfection (due to the God that created us). In other words, if there is no such thing as a perfect being, how could we even conceive of perfection?
Wow, um, that was a lot more than I intended to say. So what's the bottom line? When I tell Megan that I love her, I want to believe that my words are not simply references to biological (and thusly meaningless (at least in a grand perspective)) imperatives. I want my words to convey what I actually mean: that I reflect the perfection of the God that created me, that God's love, when I say, "I love you." If I give up my faith, my beliefs, my love loses all meaning.
And that is one of the myriad reasons I follow a religion.
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