Reason 32 You Know Your Night Was Awesome:

Towards the end of the night you start solving mathematical logic problems.

Round and round and round and round and round we go

Strange groups huddle up in corners and hallways and the middle of the floor with a single girl as the nucleus of the amoeba. The only guys who have groups surrounding them are loners in awkward situations or those holding coke or aderall or xanax or uppers of any other variety. Some awkwardly dance and some awkwardly avoid doing so. The pretty girls stand around and soak in the attention while the shy guys sit around and ogle the pretty girls wishing with their whole hearts that the pretty girls would pay the slightest bit of attention to them. There is inevitable nakedness and inevitable drunkenness and inevitable delusions of grandeur about finding one's one true love or at least a love for the night. Hugs and handshakes and cheek kisses and pats on the back accompany the loneliness found in most everyone's eyes. Drinks are poured when no more drinks are needed. Pills are popped, bodies are stared down, hopes are raised, dreamed are dashed, and people are watched.

What would have happened if everyone had stayed at home? Nothing different.

Metaphysical Ramblings and Mindless Charades


I'm studying for my metaphysics final right now. Ok, not "right now" since I doubt I can multi-task well enough to write a web entry and study for metaphysics at the same time. My final is on personal identity, for the most part, and how absolutists take it versus empiricists. Interesting stuff if you are interested in worm theory, the self indexical "I", thought experiments about people named X and Y, cluster theory, and whether pain is purely physical or something much deeper.

Oh, I'm probably going to fail by the way. So if anyone has all these concepts down pretty well, you're more than welcome to take the final for me. I'm sure nobody would notice that it wasn't me. Anyone? Anyone? ::crickets chirp:: Fine.

In other news during this "study break" I shall put "Grant looks like" into google and pick out the best answers that possibly satisfy that query:

-Grant looks like a "Butch Lesbian"
I'm not sure why that's in quotes...but apparently I look like a girl who looks like a guy?

-Grant looks like a six month old in his latest picture.
Hey...come on, I know I look young, but seriously

-Grant looks like a monkey
Really?

-Grant looks like he's having a bit more fun now.
If this was said AFTER my finals...it might be true

-Grant looks like a dashing man of the world.
Why thank you...I think?

-Grant looks like a great opportunity.
I am!

-Grant looks like fun.
I am!

-Grant looks like a beastie boy.
I'm not even sure how to respond to this

-Grant looks like a manly man in that outfit.
So I DON'T look like a butch lesbian?

Alright, alright, back to studying.

DOWN WITH EMO HAIRCUTS!


My hair was getting WAY too crazy.



No...seriously.



So I contemplated a new style...



...and ended up with something nice and unoriginal.



Anyone need some extra hair?

love me

He sees her standing in the corner looking…bored
Her eyes drift, hips shift, hair flips…bored
He stares, boring holes into her head with his…eyes
He thinks look, look at me, but don’t see through my…lies

Drink in hand, walks right up to her, she ig…nores
Another drink, less inhibition, he im…plores
She looks, looks, sees herself reflecting in his…soul
Voices stripped, meaningless, desires meaning…ful



Words slip around his brain like wet feet on porcelain
Love drips from her lips but there’s no truth sinking in
Another girl another guy another night another lie
You…I’ll let you in



Minds hazy, speeding home, hands reaching, name’s un…known
He talks to fill the silence which has definitely…grown
She listens, doesn’t care, hopes they’ll soon be to his…home
Ignore conscience, embrace impulse, real love’s never really…known

He pours another drink, thinking it will help him…cope
She walks out of the bathroom, wafting scent is that of…soap
He starts to think this through but then he thinks he better…not
She never thought this through it’s just another coping…plot

The morning after, eyes closed, he winces from the…pain
He knows how much he lost last night, not sure of what he…gained
It’s all for fun it’s all for jest, at least that’s what he’s…told
He reaches over, empty bed, the pillow now is…cold


::
::



You can’t control your life or death
You can’t control your very breath
You can’t control how deep the depths
Of what you can’t control will go

You are the soul survivor now
You’ll make them pity you somehow
You’ll cry your tears furrow your brow
You’ll let your lack of control show

You cover up all your past pain
You fill your life with empty gain
Your exploits filling you with shame
You hate the light, go down below

You want so desperately to leave
You want them all to now believe
You are perfect, don’t need reprieve
Please tell yourself the truth you know